sleeping in : 07/16/2026

what'd i miss?

hi! i'm back(slash). though i'm still probably not gonna keep up with weekly updates, not for a little longer at least. maybe when summer's over and i'm back to school.

anyways, what have i been up to since the last update?

vacationing

last weekend i went out on vacation with my family. we headed up north to duluth! if you've never been, then you're missing out! it's really really pretty up there.

getting to see lake superior is always a lot of fun, though i think calling it a "lake" is pushing it a bit... that thing is fuckin' huge!!! being on the shoreline of lake superior and looking off into the horizon makes you feel microscopic.

i guess i never really took the time to properly think about the scale of it... i'm looking at a map right now and its like, half the size of minnesota!!!

the downtown area in duluth is always one of my favorite parts. there's something about big cities that're so enticing to me for some reason... i guess it's mostly just the aesthetics (and possibilities for graffiti).

i could never ever see myself living in a big city like duluth or anything though. as cool as they are, i definitely enjoy my quiet suburban lifestyle a LOT better.

it's a bit funny i guess. online, i like to be percieved as this kinda... "cool girl" that gets out a lot and chases after excitment and all that, fuckin' shit up or whatever.

but i'm just kind of another chump on the internet! sitting around at her computer every day, only leaving her room on occasion for food and other stuff.

i do daydream sometimes, about getting out more, and doing cool shit! i'm really interested in graffiti and street art but... i've never really had the chance to do anything like that!

and i wanna get out and meet cool people! see new things! be who i wanna be! but alas... i'm still just some unemployed tranny on the internet. LOL

feeling weird

july 13th, three days ago. i recieved a message.

that girl i hadn't barely thought about for months at that point, shot me over a message. i had no idea who it was at first, but she told me, and said she wanted to talk.

my heart felt like a rabid animal, trying to eat its way out of my goddamn chest! what??????? why????? huh??????????????

she was being pretty persistent about the whole talking thing, so i just... went with it?????? whyd i do that???????? what the fuck are you doing???? hello????????

surprisingly she didn't seem... that mad about what i did to her. of course she still hates me pretty bad (duh) but... i was definitely expecting more anger, and apparently she was too?

we chitchatted for like... i dont even know how long, i don't remember, just catching up and telling each other what's been going on in our lives the past 6 months.

she changed quite a bit, and i hadn't, not even a lick. it was stange... talking to her again, i knew 100% that it was her, but... like... i don't even know how to describe it!

the whole time i felt... just odd, hazy, foggy, weird. but it wasn't really bad? i guess it was nice talking to her again, but i just can't not feel weird about the whole thing.

i guess the one highlight of that entire night was that i finally got to apologize, properly, with my voice. and i got to know that she understood that i was genuinely sorry. it was relieving i guess, to finally get some closure? iunno.

and if you (the girl) are reading this right now then... uhmmm awkwarrrddddddddddddd.......

ok ok bye bye thanks for reading thgius blogpost meow